_{Jiveny Speaks at TEDxBrisbane 2107. #StandUp 02 December 2017, Brisbane, Australia. Photo: TEDxBrisbane}

In December 2017 I took a big step towards an important dream of mine and gave a 60-second talk on what I call ‘Empowered Vulnerability’ for TEDx Brisbane (video to come).

If you’re familiar with TED talks, you will probably agree that the TED community is rich with insight. Ideas are one of my favourite toys to play with and since I ever came accross TED, its been my dream to share my own ideas upon the TED stage despite my previously crippling fears of public speaking.

Reflecting on why this is such an important dream to me has prompted me to share my top five recommendations of TED talks relevant to dating, attraction and relationships.

In no particular order:

What We Don’t Teach Kids About Sex – Sue Jaye Johnson

As parents, it’s our job to teach our kids about sex. But beyond “the talk,” which covers biology and reproduction, there’s so much more we can say about the human experience of being in our bodies. Introducing “The Talk 2.0,” Sue Jaye Johnson shows us how we can teach our children to tune in to their sensations and provide them with the language to communicate their desires and emotions — without shutting down or numbing out.

The Secret To Desire In A Long-Term Relationship – Esther Perel

In long-term relationships, we often expect our beloved to be both best friend and erotic partner. But as Esther Perel argues, good and committed sex draws on two conflicting needs: our need for security and our need for surprise. So how do you sustain desire? With wit and eloquence, Perel lets us in on the mystery of erotic intelligence.

Your Body Language May Shape Who You Are – Amy Cuddy

Body language affects how others see us, but it may also change how we see ourselves. Social psychologist Amy Cuddy argues that “power posing” — standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident — can boost feelings of confidence, and might have an impact on our chances for success. NOTE: Some of the findings presented in this talk have been referenced in an ongoing debate among social scientists about robustness and reproducibility. Read “Criticisms & updates” below for more details as well as Amy Cuddy’s response.

The Power Of Vulnerability – Brene Brown

Brené Brown studies human connection — our ability to empathize, belong, love. In a poignant, funny talk, she shares a deep insight from her research, one that sent her on a personal quest to know herself as well as to understand humanity. A talk to share.

How I Hacked Online Dating – Amy Webb

Amy Webb was having no luck with online dating. The dates she liked didn’t write her back, and her own profile attracted crickets (and worse). So, as any fan of data would do: she started making a spreadsheet. Hear the story of how she went on to hack her online dating life — with frustrating, funny and life-changing results.