LESS EGO / MORE SOUL

Emotions are a tricky aspect of being human. They are the language of the soul; subtle, elusive and cryptic. Often they defy the rationality of the mind and the logic of our society. While at times this can be scary and confusing we need to learn to embrace our emotions because they are the key to our happiness and understanding ourselves fully.

In a book I’ve been reading lately, Dr Elisabeth Kubler-Ross touches on the five “natural” emotions. These are defined as: Grief, Anger, Envy, Fear and Love.

I know what your thinking. “Really? But only one of those emotions seems to be positive!” – it caught me off-guard too. But you have to remember there is no “good” or “bad” – especially when it comes to emotions. You just feel what you feel.

When you scratch the surface to explore the full depth and purpose of these emotions, you might just come to see them a little more clearly for what they are – beautiful tools for cultivating one’s personal development.

After all, it is the repression of these emotions that produces the negative consequences we often wrongly associate to them.

So lets dive in and explore this underworld of emotions:

1. GRIEF
Grief is a natural emotion. It allows you to say goodbye when you don’t want to say goodbye; to express the beauty of the transition between attachment and non-attachment. It allows you to push out and expel the sadness within you when you experience any kind of loss.

Embrace it and feel it fully because when grief is suppressed it becomes chronic depression – a very unnatural emotion.

2. ANGER
Anger is a natural emotion. It allows you to distinguish what you don’t want from what you do. Expressing anger isn’t about yelling, kicking, screaming or throwing a tantrum; it’s about saying “no thank you” and providing others with clear feedback as to how they could grow. In this way, it is a powerful ingredient in promoting intimacy throughout relationships.

Embrace it and feel it fully because when anger is suppressed it becomes rage – a very unnatural emotion.

3. ENVY
Envy is a natural emotion. It makes you want to try again and try harder; to continue striving until you succeed. In short, it helps you to figure out what you want in life and encourages you to claim your full potential.

Embrace it and feel it fully because when envy is suppressed it becomes jealousy and insecurity – both very unnatural emotions.

4. FEAR
Fear is a natural emotion. It offers contrast, risk and challenge, making the game of life that little bit more interesting. It also provides us with a degree of caution to keep the body alive. Essentially it is an outgrowth of love; love of the self.

Embrace it and feel it fully because when fear is suppressed it becomes anxiety, panic and worry – all very unnatural emotions.

5. LOVE
Love is a natural emotion. It is our way of saying thank you and expressing our gratitude for our existence. It is the essence of life and should be expressed without condition, limitation, inhibition or embarrassment.

Embrace it and feel it fully because when love is suppressed it becomes possessiveness – a very unnatural emotion.

1. Stop saying “just”. Value yourself and your experiences. You are more than ‘just a secretary’ or ‘just a student’. You are incredible and have the potential to be and do anything. Believe in yourself. You deserve it.
2. Use adjectives sparingly (sometimes they get in the way of the truth).
3. Understand that you don’t have to ‘do’ or ‘be’ anything. You have complete freedom and complete responsibility for your own experience. What do you want? Chase it with passion. Be relentless. Be liberated.
4. If it feels right at the time, then it’s fine. Life is meant to be lived. There is no ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ way to live it. But consider what you want on all three dimensions – mind, body and soul.
5. Recognize the creative powerful being that you are and own it. Heck, you can manifest the weather!
6. Nothing matters. Laugh.
7. You are everything – the good and the bad, the pretty and the ugly. The aim is to choose the most magnificent aspects on offer and make them a part of your reality – that is the highest choice.
8. Learn to say “No”. “Maybe later” is not the same. You are not being respectful of yourself or others when you neglect to say “No” firmly when you mean to. Learn to say it charmingly. Learn to be comfortable with it.
9. Speak to and treat others as equal souls, for they too are human like you.
10. Be honest.