LESS EGO / MORE SOUL

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bg3l3Hmiu4E]

Do you laugh while screaming?

“Of this I am certain: something happens every time I stop fighting with the way things are. Something happens to every one of my students when they stop running their familiar programs about fear and deficiency and emptiness. I don’t know what to call this turn of events or the freshness that follows it, but I know what it feels like: It feels like relief. It feels like infinite good-ness. Like a distillation of every sweet fragrance, every hearstopping beauty, every haunting melody you’ve ever heard. It feels like the essence of tenderness, compassion, joy, peace. Like love itself. And in the moment you feel you recognize that you are it and that you’ve been here all along, waiting for your return.

When you forget, which you always do, you suddenly understand that kindness to anyone – a plant, an animal, a stranger, a partner – brings you closer to this. That taking care of your body is taking care of this. That taking care of the earth is taking car of this. And that you’d turn away from anything or anyone that asked you to leave this because this is what you’ve wanted, this is what you’ve longed for, this is what you’ve loved for eons.

You know without knowing how you know that every step you’ve ever taken, every person you’ve ever loved, every task you’ve ever accomplished has been This meeting This. You returning to yourself. And that hell is nothing more than leaving this. Heaven is already here on earth.”

- From Women, Food and God by Geneen Roth

A valuable lesson I have learnt over the course of my journey is that there is no need to have an excuse or a reason to heal.

Looking back over my life, I can see how I have created problems for myself, to fit in and to justify my ‘need’ for healing. Blinded by this, I closed myself off from love – my parents love particularly – and invited dis-ease into my life as I subconsciously sought to compensate for this suppression in other ways.

A symptom of this became evident when I realised that when I was sick I felt more comfortable in letting others fuss over me, nurture me, love me and so I would subconsciously attract sickness, when what I needed most was nurturing love.

Now I realise that in order to expand, I really need to let go of these attention-seeking behaviours and embrace the psychological femininity that allows one to process those raw emotions like pain, fear and sorrow in a healthy way.

When we create problems in our lives – consciously or unconsciously – we are creating our experience from a lack mentality, seeking to justify why we “deserve” to be healed; why we deserve love and attention.

This stems from the fear that there is not enough healing energy (unconditional love) to go around.

There is.

And wounded or not, we are all equal in our deservedness to receive such healing energy. We don’t even need to fully understand why we feel we need to heal for the healing to be justified. One just has to be motivated to expand and be the carefree person that they would like to be.

The first step is to overcome one’s fear of death.

The second, to overcome one’s fear of pain.

The third, to overcome ones fear of love, and to embrace love fully.

What if the question is not ‘why am I so infrequently the person I really want to be?’

But, ‘why do I so infrequently want to be the person I really am?’

~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer

“The biggest mistake one could ever make, is to judge their insides by another’s outsides”.

- Anonymous

We are all one…therefore:

‘All judgement is a form of self judgement.

and

All criticism is a form of self-criticism.’

– Dalai Lama

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

- Marianne Williamson

You have to risk your life to feel your life.

You have to risk your heart to feel your heart.

But when risking, you may choose to realise that you really have nothing to lose;

that you are complete just as you are.

Here’s a little history, of a bigger mystery
I have written this story into my song
If it isn’t what your used to
Then I hope it will allow you
Maybe if you choose to then you’ll sing along

I am as old as the universe
I’ve been here before and I’ll be here again
I am a child of the universe
A part of all women, and a part of all men

Once upon a sometime, and once upon a somehow
And once upon a somewhere, There was a big bang
Energy revolving, energy dissolving,
Eneryg evolving, and that is what I am.

I am not a somebody, I am not a nobody,
I am a celled one body filling this space.
All I ever could be, and all I ever would be,
and all I ever will be is here in this place.

I am but a flower, who blossoms in a hour,
and in me there’s a power that goes on and on.
Power in the roots of me, power in the shoots of me,
power in the fruit that will pass my seed on.

I am as old as the universe
I’ve been here before and I’ll be here again
I am a child of the universe
A part of all women, and a part of all men

– Rainbow Child Lyrics by Unknown

P.S. ConFest was amazing…I do recommend!