LESS EGO / MORE SOUL

‘I just…feel like I should have more to show by now, you know?’ said one of the girls.

This got me thinking a lot about the western view of life and our struggle to accumulate security through the accumulation of material wealth.

It seems to me, that at the end of the day, all any of us have to “show for ourselves” is what we think of ourselves.  No one really cares if you have a mercedes or a beach house in Hawaii. In fact, they are much more likely to be irritated or jealous by your wealth as it reminds them of their own (self-percived) “failure”.

The truth is, material wealth by no means indicates your value as a human being. Your value as a human being is solely influenced by what you think of yourself. So the question is, do you have an inner fan or an inner critic?

To me, the only true failure is failure to love oneself. That is, failure to see the beauty that is present in any given situation. When you derive your self-worth from your job or accumulated wealth it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that you need a high-ranking job to be successful. But really, this will only help you to appear successful. Real success depends on what you feel from within.

Anthony Robbins teaches us how important it is to understand our emotional values in life. Based on our emotional values and goals, we tend to create a set of  beliefs (or rules) and measure our own success or failure by our ability to meet these emotional values and feel pleasure. Beliefs often come in the form of ”if-then rules”.

For example, “if enough people know who I am, then I am successful.” or “If I earn $xxx,xxx then I will be successful.” Whatever.

On balance, there are also rules that influence our ability to deliver on our values. These are the limiting beliefs that hold us back from taking the risk of following our dreams. A common example of this is the belief, “if I feel successful then I will lose my motivation”. The real truth is, when you get too comfortable, then you are likely to lose your motivation. Paradoxically, “too comfortable” is often the mindset we get into when we continuously hold ourselves back from following our dream; when we fall deep into the security of a predictable reality.

Unfortunately, many of us have not written our own beliefs or “life-rules”. Instead they have been impressed upon our minds from the very early years of our lives. This is why it is so important to discover and define what beliefs you have collected over the years and decide for yourself if they are serving your best interests.

This is your chance to write your own life rules because life was never meant to be difficult. If you want success, it is up to you to set yourself up so that you can win this game of life.

So ,based on my values, here are my rules for life:

If I see beauty, then I feel joy.

If I am learning, then I know I am growing.

If I eat consciously (it doesn’t matter what) and enjoy my food, then I eat well.

If I move my body then I am healthy.

If I am alive, I know that I am loved.

And this one I stole form Robbins: If I learn something new, then I am successful.

Because, there is no such thing as failure.